Love Bites

“Plain Cold”

Husband: “Nabayad ko na P10,000 sa card” Sent thru SMS.
Wife: No reply.
Husband: “Nakabili ka na gift ni Dany?” Sent thru SMS
Wife: No reply.
Husband: “I thought Hillary Clinton was the coldest woman on earth.” Sent thru SMS.
Wife: “Love you” Sent thru SMS, then she gave him the surprise of his life that night.



“Timeline”

Husband: While driving, ask her wife: “Sa’n kayo naglunch nina Jackie?”
Wife: “Di ba sinabi ko na sa ‘yo?”
Husband: “Dinner ba o lunch? Pag sinabing lunch meaning to eat without any reference to time.”
Wife: “Applicable yata sa term na dinner ‘yun”
Husband: “No, sa lunch ‘yun”
Wife: “Ah, basta, ‘yung sa general na alam ng lahat. Alam mo, nakakainis ka! Kulit mo! Alam mo na ang sagot, itatanong mo pa.” And then the million dollar statement, “Ilang taon pa kitang titiisin, ha?”
Husband: “E ba’t ang sungit mo?”
Wife: “Nakakainis e.”
Husband: “Ako ba ang dahilan? Di yata”
Wife: “You are one of those.”

During office hours and paid while blogging:
Husband: “When u said while inside the car, ilang taon pa kitang titiisin? Is that a measure of how long you are willing to endure me or how short a period you are putting in a timeline before you snap? Because no matter what, this me will not change. It is a wholesale price.” Sent thru SMS.
Wife: “Pati sa text, ang lalim mo. Love you.” Sent thru SMS.
Husband: “Because clearly, it’s your mind speaking the subconscious or direct.” Sent thru SMS.
Wife: “No reply”.